Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Wilderness Yearning: Tuesday in the Fifth Week of Lent

March 27, 2012

I lift up my eyes to the hills;
   from where is my help to come?
My help comes from the Lord,
   the maker of heaven and earth.
  Psalm 121

I struggle to enter into the discipline of prayer and Lent today. It is not so much that I fear to go forward as it is that I am uncertain how much longer I can wander in the wilderness. I doubt my stamina.

Each time I labored with a daughter in the womb I met this wall. A place not where my strength failed as much as my courage. What if this soul-wrenching exertion will never end? What if the pain becomes unbearable? What if I cannot endure?

And so each time I threw myself on the mercy of those around me. And each time they were there, my husband most of all. To help me bear the pain. To help me find the way. To be the hands that held me and then reached to welcome each daughter.

I need not struggle alone in the desert. I can ask for and without doubt receive the succor I need. God’s mercy most of all.

copyright © Anne E. Kitch 2012