But I am like a green olive tree in the house of God;
I trust in the mercy of God for ever and ever.
Some days I forget that I am middle-aged. I see my children and the children of others grow and mature but somehow think of myself as standing still in time. Not because I want to remain young, but because I don’t feel particularly wise or proficient, and am continually looking up to others who are older and wiser than I am. In this tug of war with time and maturity, sometimes I am at peace with what I do not know and encounter my limitations with calm, and other times I want to get it all right already.
My lifelong formation in Christ is just that—lifelong. I will always be on a learning curve, will forever be finding new insights along familiar paths, will constantly be confronted today with what I did not understand yesterday. Along the way my body will necessarily diminish. But what will not diminish is God’s love for me, God’s call for me, and the infinite ways in which I can respond.