Empty urgency

Tuesday of the First Week of Advent

Lead me, O Lord, in your righteousness.
because of those who lie in wait for me;
make your way straight before me.
Psalm 5:8

The file folder lies there as an affront, tugging at my sense of duty, somewhat buried on my desk but not quite obscured. Its bright green color is intentional, as well as its label—urgent. It is meant to draw my attention so that I will not forget it or set aside the work contained within.

Nevertheless, it has been sitting unattended for weeks that have become months, holding a final piece of paperwork from our move last April. Its completion has been complicated by all that comes with a transition. But I have also been hampered by allowing the task to become larger than it is, letting myself become almost paralyzed by a sense of failure. These are familiar snares that lie in wait for me.

In my spiritual life too sometimes my way forward is blocked by obstacles that I create. Often, I just have to wait until God clears the path before me.

Today the way opens. In calmness I find all the right paperwork, complete the form, put it in an envelope. Tomorrow it will be in the mail.

I leave the urgent folder empty on my desk and give my attention more fully to this season, this Advent, this time of waiting.