Athirst

Thursday in the Third Week of Lent

As the deer longs for the water-brooks,
so longs my soul for you, O God.
My soul is athirst for God, athirst for the living God;
when shall I come to appear before the presence of God?
Psalm 42:1-2

I wake and am immediately aware of my thirst. I reach for the water bottle at my bedside and know that the small amount left in it will not be enough. I will have to replenish it soon.

My soul is thirsty this morning too, and I am aware of a deep longing beneath the surface of my desire for water. I carry the ache of yearning into my morning discipline of journaling and prayer. What is it I am searching for? What emptiness cries out to be filled?

And I realize I am in the midst of the wilderness. It is the middle of the Lenten journey. Not the beginning, when I set out with determination and a sense of purpose. Nor can I yet envision the culmination as a reality. I do not know if I will accomplish that for which I set out. The middle is muddled and uncertain.

But the thirst reminds me that I know what it is like to be filled. My soul can be replenished as well. After all, I belong to the God who gave water out of the rock and rained abundance on her people on the desert. Even in the complex and confusing middle, where outcomes are unclear and things remain unresolved, my needs are not unmet. The living water is bountiful and offered to me with abundance.